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1-1
Enter KING HENRY, LORD JOHN OF LANCASTER, the EARL of WESTMORELAND, SIR WALTER BLUNT, and others
KING HENRY IV
So shaken as we are, so wan with care,
Find we a time for frighted peace to pant,
And breathe short-winded accents of new broils
To be commenced in strands afar remote.
5No more the thirsty entrance of this soil
Shall daub her lips with her own children's blood;
Nor more shall trenching war channel her fields,
Nor bruise her flowerets with the armed hoofs
Of hostile paces: those opposed eyes,
10Which, like the meteors of a troubled heaven,
All of one nature, of one substance bred,
Did lately meet in the intestine shock
And furious close of civil butchery
Shall now, in mutual well-beseeming ranks,
15March all one way and be no more opposed
Against acquaintance, kindred and allies:
The edge of war, like an ill-sheathed knife,
No more shall cut his master. Therefore, friends,
As far as to the sepulchre of Christ,
20Whose soldier now, under whose blessed cross
We are impressed and engaged to fight,
Forthwith a power of English shall we levy;
Whose arms were moulded in their mothers' womb
To chase these pagans in those holy fields
25Over whose acres walk'd those blessed feet
Which fourteen hundred years ago were nail'd
For our advantage on the bitter cross.
But this our purpose now is twelve month old,
And bootless 'tis to tell you we will go:
30Therefore we meet not now. Then let me hear
Of you, my gentle cousin Westmoreland,
What yesternight our council did decree
In forwarding this dear expedience.
WESTMORELAND
My liege, this haste was hot in question,
35And many limits of the charge set down
But yesternight: when all athwart there came
A post from Wales loaden with heavy news;
Whose worst was, that the noble Mortimer,
Leading the men of Herefordshire to fight
40Against the irregular and wild Glendower,
Was by the rude hands of that Welshman taken,
A thousand of his people butchered;
Upon whose dead corpse there was such misuse,
Such beastly shameless transformation,
45By those Welshwomen done as may not be
Without much shame retold or spoken of.
KING HENRY IV
It seems then that the tidings of this broil
Brake off our business for the Holy Land.
WESTMORELAND
This match'd with other did, my gracious lord;
50For more uneven and unwelcome news
Came from the north and thus it did import:
On Holy-rood day, the gallant Hotspur there,
Young Harry Percy and brave Archibald,
That ever-valiant and approved Scot,
55At Holmedon met,
Where they did spend a sad and bloody hour,
As by discharge of their artillery,
And shape of likelihood, the news was told;
For he that brought them, in the very heat
60And pride of their contention did take horse,
Uncertain of the issue any way.
KING HENRY IV
Here is a dear, a true industrious friend,
Sir Walter Blunt, new lighted from his horse.
Stain'd with the variation of each soil
65Betwixt that Holmedon and this seat of ours;
And he hath brought us smooth and welcome news.
The Earl of Douglas is discomfited:
Ten thousand bold Scots, two and twenty knights,
Balk'd in their own blood did Sir Walter see
70On Holmedon's plains. Of prisoners, Hotspur took
Mordake the Earl of Fife, and eldest son
To beaten Douglas; and the Earl of Athol,
Of Murray, Angus, and Menteith:
And is not this an honourable spoil?
75A gallant prize? ha, cousin, is it not?
WESTMORELAND
In faith,
It is a conquest for a prince to boast of.
KING HENRY IV
Yea, there thou makest me sad and makest me sin
In envy that my Lord Northumberland
80Should be the father to so blest a son,
A son who is the theme of honour's tongue;
Amongst a grove, the very straightest plant;
Who is sweet Fortune's minion and her pride:
Whilst I, by looking on the praise of him,
85See riot and dishonour stain the brow
Of my young Harry. O that it could be proved
That some night-tripping fairy had exchanged
In cradle-clothes our children where they lay,
And call'd mine Percy, his Plantagenet!
90Then would I have his Harry, and he mine.
But let him from my thoughts. What think you, coz,
Of this young Percy's pride? the prisoners,
Which he in this adventure hath surprised,
To his own use he keeps; and sends me word,
95I shall have none but Mordake Earl of Fife.
WESTMORELAND
This is his uncle's teaching; this is Worcester,
Malevolent to you in all aspects;
Which makes him prune himself, and bristle up
The crest of youth against your dignity.
KING HENRY IV
100But I have sent for him to answer this;
And for this cause awhile we must neglect
Our holy purpose to Jerusalem.
Cousin, on Wednesday next our council we
Will hold at Windsor; so inform the lords:
105But come yourself with speed to us again;
For more is to be said and to be done
Than out of anger can be uttered.
WESTMORELAND
I will, my liege.
Exeunt
1-2
Enter the PRINCE OF WALES and FALSTAFF
FALSTAFF
Now, Hal, what time of day is it, lad?
PRINCE HENRY
Thou art so fat-witted, with drinking of old sack
and unbuttoning thee after supper and sleeping upon
benches after noon, that thou hast forgotten to
5demand that truly which thou wouldst truly know.
What a devil hast thou to do with the time of the
day? Unless hours were cups of sack and minutes
capons and clocks the tongues of bawds and dials the
signs of leaping-houses and the blessed sun himself
10a fair hot wench in flame-coloured taffeta, I see no
reason why thou shouldst be so superfluous to demand
the time of the day.
FALSTAFF
Indeed, you come near me now, Hal; for we that take
purses go by the moon and the seven stars, and not
15by Phoebus, he,'that wandering knight so fair.' And,
I prithee, sweet wag, when thou art king, as, God
save thy grace,--majesty I should say, for grace
thou wilt have none,--
PRINCE HENRY
What, none?
FALSTAFF
20No, by my troth, not so much as will serve to
prologue to an egg and butter.
PRINCE HENRY
Well, how then? come, roundly, roundly.
FALSTAFF
Marry, then, sweet wag, when thou art king, let not
us that are squires of the night's body be called
25thieves of the day's beauty: let us be Diana's
foresters, gentlemen of the shade, minions of the
moon; and let men say we be men of good government,
being governed, as the sea is, by our noble and
chaste mistress the moon, under whose countenance we steal.
PRINCE HENRY
30Thou sayest well, and it holds well too; for the
fortune of us that are the moon's men doth ebb and
flow like the sea, being governed, as the sea is,
by the moon. As, for proof, now: a purse of gold
most resolutely snatched on Monday night and most
35dissolutely spent on Tuesday morning; got with
swearing 'Lay by' and spent with crying 'Bring in;'
now in as low an ebb as the foot of the ladder
and by and by in as high a flow as the ridge of the gallows.
FALSTAFF
By the Lord, thou sayest true, lad. And is not my
40hostess of the tavern a most sweet wench?
PRINCE HENRY
As the honey of Hybla, my old lad of the castle. And
is not a buff jerkin a most sweet robe of durance?
FALSTAFF
How now, how now, mad wag! what, in thy quips and
thy quiddities? what a plague have I to do with a
45buff jerkin?
PRINCE HENRY
Why, what a pox have I to do with my hostess of the tavern?
FALSTAFF
Well, thou hast called her to a reckoning many a
time and oft.
PRINCE HENRY
Did I ever call for thee to pay thy part?
FALSTAFF
50No; I'll give thee thy due, thou hast paid all there.
PRINCE HENRY
Yea, and elsewhere, so far as my coin would stretch;
and where it would not, I have used my credit.
FALSTAFF
Yea, and so used it that were it not here apparent
that thou art heir apparent--But, I prithee, sweet
55wag, shall there be gallows standing in England when
thou art king? and resolution thus fobbed as it is
with the rusty curb of old father antic the law? Do
not thou, when thou art king, hang a thief.
PRINCE HENRY
No; thou shalt.
FALSTAFF
60Shall I? O rare! By the Lord, I'll be a brave judge.
PRINCE HENRY
Thou judgest false already: I mean, thou shalt have
the hanging of the thieves and so become a rare hangman.
FALSTAFF
Well, Hal, well; and in some sort it jumps with my
humour as well as waiting in the court, I can tell
65you.
PRINCE HENRY
For obtaining of suits?
FALSTAFF
Yea, for obtaining of suits, whereof the hangman
hath no lean wardrobe. 'Sblood, I am as melancholy
as a gib cat or a lugged bear.
PRINCE HENRY
70Or an old lion, or a lover's lute.
FALSTAFF
Yea, or the drone of a Lincolnshire bagpipe.
PRINCE HENRY
What sayest thou to a hare, or the melancholy of
Moor-ditch?
FALSTAFF
Thou hast the most unsavoury similes and art indeed
75the most comparative, rascalliest, sweet young
prince. But, Hal, I prithee, trouble me no more
with vanity. I would to God thou and I knew where a
commodity of good names were to be bought. An old
lord of the council rated me the other day in the
80street about you, sir, but I marked him not; and yet
he talked very wisely, but I regarded him not; and
yet he talked wisely, and in the street too.
PRINCE HENRY
Thou didst well; for wisdom cries out in the
streets, and no man regards it.
FALSTAFF
85O, thou hast damnable iteration and art indeed able
to corrupt a saint. Thou hast done much harm upon
me, Hal; God forgive thee for it! Before I knew
thee, Hal, I knew nothing; and now am I, if a man
should speak truly, little better than one of the
90wicked. I must give over this life, and I will give
it over: by the Lord, and I do not, I am a villain:
I'll be damned for never a king's son in
Christendom.
PRINCE HENRY
Where shall we take a purse tomorrow, Jack?
FALSTAFF
95'Zounds, where thou wilt, lad; I'll make one; an I
do not, call me villain and baffle me.
PRINCE HENRY
I see a good amendment of life in thee; from praying
to purse-taking.
FALSTAFF
Why, Hal, 'tis my vocation, Hal; 'tis no sin for a
100man to labour in his vocation.
Poins! Now shall we know if Gadshill have set a
match. O, if men were to be saved by merit, what
hole in hell were hot enough for him? This is the
most omnipotent villain that ever cried 'Stand' to
105a true man.
PRINCE HENRY
Good morrow, Ned.
POINS
Good morrow, sweet Hal. What says Monsieur Remorse?
what says Sir John Sack and Sugar? Jack! how
agrees the devil and thee about thy soul, that thou
110soldest him on Good-Friday last for a cup of Madeira
and a cold capon's leg?
PRINCE HENRY
Sir John stands to his word, the devil shall have
his bargain; for he was never yet a breaker of
proverbs: he will give the devil his due.
POINS
115Then art thou damned for keeping thy word with the devil.
PRINCE HENRY
Else he had been damned for cozening the devil.
POINS
But, my lads, my lads, to-morrow morning, by four
o'clock, early at Gadshill! there are pilgrims going
to Canterbury with rich offerings, and traders
120riding to London with fat purses: I have vizards
for you all; you have horses for yourselves:
Gadshill lies to-night in Rochester: I have bespoke
supper to-morrow night in Eastcheap: we may do it
as secure as sleep. If you will go, I will stuff
125your purses full of crowns; if you will not, tarry
at home and be hanged.
FALSTAFF
Hear ye, Yedward; if I tarry at home and go not,
I'll hang you for going.
POINS
You will, chops?
FALSTAFF
130Hal, wilt thou make one?
PRINCE HENRY
Who, I rob? I a thief? not I, by my faith.
FALSTAFF
There's neither honesty, manhood, nor good
fellowship in thee, nor thou camest not of the blood
royal, if thou darest not stand for ten shillings.
PRINCE HENRY
135Well then, once in my days I'll be a madcap.
FALSTAFF
Why, that's well said.
PRINCE HENRY
Well, come what will, I'll tarry at home.
FALSTAFF
By the Lord, I'll be a traitor then, when thou art king.
PRINCE HENRY
I care not.
POINS
140Sir John, I prithee, leave the prince and me alone:
I will lay him down such reasons for this adventure
that he shall go.
FALSTAFF
Well, God give thee the spirit of persuasion and him
the ears of profiting, that what thou speakest may
145move and what he hears may be believed, that the
true prince may, for recreation sake, prove a false
thief; for the poor abuses of the time want
countenance. Farewell: you shall find me in Eastcheap.
PRINCE HENRY
Farewell, thou latter spring! farewell, All-hallown summer!
Exit Falstaff
POINS
150Now, my good sweet honey lord, ride with us
to-morrow: I have a jest to execute that I cannot
manage alone. Falstaff, Bardolph, Peto and Gadshill
shall rob those men that we have already waylaid:
yourself and I will not be there; and when they
155have the booty, if you and I do not rob them, cut
this head off from my shoulders.
PRINCE HENRY
How shall we part with them in setting forth?
POINS
Why, we will set forth before or after them, and
appoint them a place of meeting, wherein it is at
160our pleasure to fail, and then will they adventure
upon the exploit themselves; which they shall have
no sooner achieved, but we'll set upon them.
PRINCE HENRY
Yea, but 'tis like that they will know us by our
horses, by our habits and by every other
165appointment, to be ourselves.
POINS
Tut! our horses they shall not see: I'll tie them
in the wood; our vizards we will change after we
leave them: and, sirrah, I have cases of buckram
for the nonce, to immask our noted outward garments.
PRINCE HENRY
170Yea, but I doubt they will be too hard for us.
POINS
Well, for two of them, I know them to be as
true-bred cowards as ever turned back; and for the
third, if he fight longer than he sees reason, I'll
forswear arms. The virtue of this jest will be, the
175incomprehensible lies that this same fat rogue will
tell us when we meet at supper: how thirty, at
least, he fought with; what wards, what blows, what
extremities he endured; and in the reproof of this
lies the jest.
PRINCE HENRY
180Well, I'll go with thee: provide us all things
necessary and meet me to-morrow night in Eastcheap;
there I'll sup. Farewell.
POINS
Farewell, my lord.
Exit Poins
PRINCE HENRY
I know you all, and will awhile uphold
185The unyoked humour of your idleness:
Yet herein will I imitate the sun,
Who doth permit the base contagious clouds
To smother up his beauty from the world,
That, when he please again to be himself,
190Being wanted, he may be more wonder'd at,
By breaking through the foul and ugly mists
Of vapours that did seem to strangle him.
If all the year were playing holidays,
To sport would be as tedious as to work;
195But when they seldom come, they wish'd for come,
And nothing pleaseth but rare accidents.
So, when this loose behavior I throw off
And pay the debt I never promised,
By how much better than my word I am,
200By so much shall I falsify men's hopes;
And like bright metal on a sullen ground,
My reformation, glittering o'er my fault,
Shall show more goodly and attract more eyes
Than that which hath no foil to set it off.
205I'll so offend, to make offence a skill;
Redeeming time when men think least I will.
Exit
1-3
Enter the KING, NORTHUMBERLAND, WORCESTER, HOTSPUR, SIR WALTER BLUNT, with others
KING HENRY IV
My blood hath been too cold and temperate,
Unapt to stir at these indignities,
And you have found me; for accordingly
You tread upon my patience: but be sure
5I will from henceforth rather be myself,
Mighty and to be fear'd, than my condition;
Which hath been smooth as oil, soft as young down,
And therefore lost that title of respect
Which the proud soul ne'er pays but to the proud.
EARL OF WORCESTER
10Our house, my sovereign liege, little deserves
The scourge of greatness to be used on it;
And that same greatness too which our own hands
Have holp to make so portly.
NORTHUMBERLAND
My lord.--
KING HENRY IV
15Worcester, get thee gone; for I do see
Danger and disobedience in thine eye:
O, sir, your presence is too bold and peremptory,
And majesty might never yet endure
The moody frontier of a servant brow.
20You have good leave to leave us: when we need
Your use and counsel, we shall send for you.
Exit Worcester
KING HENRY IV
You were about to speak.
NORTHUMBERLAND
Yea, my good lord.
Those prisoners in your highness' name demanded,
25Which Harry Percy here at Holmedon took,
Were, as he says, not with such strength denied
As is deliver'd to your majesty:
Either envy, therefore, or misprison
Is guilty of this fault and not my son.
HOTSPUR
30My liege, I did deny no prisoners.
But I remember, when the fight was done,
When I was dry with rage and extreme toil,
Breathless and faint, leaning upon my sword,
Came there a certain lord, neat, and trimly dress'd,
35Fresh as a bridegroom; and his chin new reap'd
Show'd like a stubble-land at harvest-home;
He was perfumed like a milliner;
And 'twixt his finger and his thumb he held
A pouncet-box, which ever and anon
40He gave his nose and took't away again;
Who therewith angry, when it next came there,
Took it in snuff; and still he smiled and talk'd,
And as the soldiers bore dead bodies by,
He call'd them untaught knaves, unmannerly,
45To bring a slovenly unhandsome corse
Betwixt the wind and his nobility.
With many holiday and lady terms
He question'd me; amongst the rest, demanded
My prisoners in your majesty's behalf.
50I then, all smarting with my wounds being cold,
To be so pester'd with a popinjay,
Out of my grief and my impatience,
Answer'd neglectingly I know not what,
He should or he should not; for he made me mad
55To see him shine so brisk and smell so sweet
And talk so like a waiting-gentlewoman
Of guns and drums and wounds,--God save the mark!--
And telling me the sovereign'st thing on earth
Was parmaceti for an inward bruise;
60And that it was great pity, so it was,
This villanous salt-petre should be digg'd
Out of the bowels of the harmless earth,
Which many a good tall fellow had destroy'd
So cowardly; and but for these vile guns,
65He would himself have been a soldier.
This bald unjointed chat of his, my lord,
I answer'd indirectly, as I said;
And I beseech you, let not his report
Come current for an accusation
70Betwixt my love and your high majesty.
SIR WALTER BLUNT
The circumstance consider'd, good my lord,
Whate'er Lord Harry Percy then had said
To such a person and in such a place,
At such a time, with all the rest retold,
75May reasonably die and never rise
To do him wrong or any way impeach
What then he said, so he unsay it now.
KING HENRY IV
Why, yet he doth deny his prisoners,
But with proviso and exception,
80That we at our own charge shall ransom straight
His brother-in-law, the foolish Mortimer;
Who, on my soul, hath wilfully betray'd
The lives of those that he did lead to fight
Against that great magician, damn'd Glendower,
85Whose daughter, as we hear, the Earl of March
Hath lately married. Shall our coffers, then,
Be emptied to redeem a traitor home?
Shall we but treason? and indent with fears,
When they have lost and forfeited themselves?
90No, on the barren mountains let him starve;
For I shall never hold that man my friend
Whose tongue shall ask me for one penny cost
To ransom home revolted Mortimer.
HOTSPUR
Revolted Mortimer!
95He never did fall off, my sovereign liege,
But by the chance of war; to prove that true
Needs no more but one tongue for all those wounds,
Those mouthed wounds, which valiantly he took
When on the gentle Severn's sedgy bank,
100In single opposition, hand to hand,
He did confound the best part of an hour
In changing hardiment with great Glendower:
Three times they breathed and three times did
they drink,
105Upon agreement, of swift Severn's flood;
Who then, affrighted with their bloody looks,
Ran fearfully among the trembling reeds,
And hid his crisp head in the hollow bank,
Bloodstained with these valiant combatants.
110Never did base and rotten policy
Colour her working with such deadly wounds;
Nor could the noble Mortimer
Receive so many, and all willingly:
Then let not him be slander'd with revolt.
KING HENRY IV
115Thou dost belie him, Percy, thou dost belie him;
He never did encounter with Glendower:
I tell thee,
He durst as well have met the devil alone
As Owen Glendower for an enemy.
120Art thou not ashamed? But, sirrah, henceforth
Let me not hear you speak of Mortimer:
Send me your prisoners with the speediest means,
Or you shall hear in such a kind from me
As will displease you. My Lord Northumberland,
125We licence your departure with your son.
Send us your prisoners, or you will hear of it.
Exeunt King Henry, Blunt, and train
HOTSPUR
An if the devil come and roar for them,
I will not send them: I will after straight
And tell him so; for I will ease my heart,
130Albeit I make a hazard of my head.
NORTHUMBERLAND
What, drunk with choler? stay and pause awhile:
Here comes your uncle.
Re-enter WORCESTER
HOTSPUR
Speak of Mortimer!
'Zounds, I will speak of him; and let my soul
135Want mercy, if I do not join with him:
Yea, on his part I'll empty all these veins,
And shed my dear blood drop by drop in the dust,
But I will lift the down-trod Mortimer
As high in the air as this unthankful king,
140As this ingrate and canker'd Bolingbroke.
NORTHUMBERLAND
Brother, the king hath made your nephew mad.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Who struck this heat up after I was gone?
HOTSPUR
He will, forsooth, have all my prisoners;
And when I urged the ransom once again
145Of my wife's brother, then his cheek look'd pale,
And on my face he turn'd an eye of death,
Trembling even at the name of Mortimer.
EARL OF WORCESTER
I cannot blame him: was not he proclaim'd
By Richard that dead is the next of blood?
NORTHUMBERLAND
150He was; I heard the proclamation:
And then it was when the unhappy king,
--Whose wrongs in us God pardon!--did set forth
Upon his Irish expedition;
From whence he intercepted did return
155To be deposed and shortly murdered.
EARL OF WORCESTER
And for whose death we in the world's wide mouth
Live scandalized and foully spoken of.
HOTSPUR
But soft, I pray you; did King Richard then
Proclaim my brother Edmund Mortimer
160Heir to the crown?
NORTHUMBERLAND
He did; myself did hear it.
HOTSPUR
Nay, then I cannot blame his cousin king,
That wished him on the barren mountains starve.
But shall it be that you, that set the crown
165Upon the head of this forgetful man
And for his sake wear the detested blot
Of murderous subornation, shall it be,
That you a world of curses undergo,
Being the agents, or base second means,
170The cords, the ladder, or the hangman rather?
O, pardon me that I descend so low,
To show the line and the predicament
Wherein you range under this subtle king;
Shall it for shame be spoken in these days,
175Or fill up chronicles in time to come,
That men of your nobility and power
Did gage them both in an unjust behalf,
As both of you--God pardon it!--have done,
To put down Richard, that sweet lovely rose,
180An plant this thorn, this canker, Bolingbroke?
And shall it in more shame be further spoken,
That you are fool'd, discarded and shook off
By him for whom these shames ye underwent?
No; yet time serves wherein you may redeem
185Your banish'd honours and restore yourselves
Into the good thoughts of the world again,
Revenge the jeering and disdain'd contempt
Of this proud king, who studies day and night
To answer all the debt he owes to you
190Even with the bloody payment of your deaths:
Therefore, I say--
EARL OF WORCESTER
Peace, cousin, say no more:
And now I will unclasp a secret book,
And to your quick-conceiving discontents
195I'll read you matter deep and dangerous,
As full of peril and adventurous spirit
As to o'er-walk a current roaring loud
On the unsteadfast footing of a spear.
HOTSPUR
If he fall in, good night! or sink or swim:
200Send danger from the east unto the west,
So honour cross it from the north to south,
And let them grapple: O, the blood more stirs
To rouse a lion than to start a hare!
NORTHUMBERLAND
Imagination of some great exploit
205Drives him beyond the bounds of patience.
HOTSPUR
By heaven, methinks it were an easy leap,
To pluck bright honour from the pale-faced moon,
Or dive into the bottom of the deep,
Where fathom-line could never touch the ground,
210And pluck up drowned honour by the locks;
So he that doth redeem her thence might wear
Without corrival, all her dignities:
But out upon this half-faced fellowship!
EARL OF WORCESTER
He apprehends a world of figures here,
215But not the form of what he should attend.
Good cousin, give me audience for a while.
HOTSPUR
I cry you mercy.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Those same noble Scots
That are your prisoners,--
HOTSPUR
220I'll keep them all;
By God, he shall not have a Scot of them;
No, if a Scot would save his soul, he shall not:
I'll keep them, by this hand.
EARL OF WORCESTER
You start away
225And lend no ear unto my purposes.
Those prisoners you shall keep.
HOTSPUR
Nay, I will; that's flat:
He said he would not ransom Mortimer;
Forbad my tongue to speak of Mortimer;
230But I will find him when he lies asleep,
And in his ear I'll holla 'Mortimer!'
Nay,
I'll have a starling shall be taught to speak
Nothing but 'Mortimer,' and give it him
235To keep his anger still in motion.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Hear you, cousin; a word.
HOTSPUR
All studies here I solemnly defy,
Save how to gall and pinch this Bolingbroke:
And that same sword-and-buckler Prince of Wales,
240But that I think his father loves him not
And would be glad he met with some mischance,
I would have him poison'd with a pot of ale.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Farewell, kinsman: I'll talk to you
When you are better temper'd to attend.
NORTHUMBERLAND
245Why, what a wasp-stung and impatient fool
Art thou to break into this woman's mood,
Tying thine ear to no tongue but thine own!
HOTSPUR
Why, look you, I am whipp'd and scourged with rods,
Nettled and stung with pismires, when I hear
250Of this vile politician, Bolingbroke.
In Richard's time,--what do you call the place?--
A plague upon it, it is in Gloucestershire;
'Twas where the madcap duke his uncle kept,
His uncle York; where I first bow'd my knee
255Unto this king of smiles, this Bolingbroke,--
'Sblood!--
When you and he came back from Ravenspurgh.
NORTHUMBERLAND
At Berkley castle.
HOTSPUR
You say true:
260Why, what a candy deal of courtesy
This fawning greyhound then did proffer me!
Look,'when his infant fortune came to age,'
And 'gentle Harry Percy,' and 'kind cousin;'
O, the devil take such cozeners! God forgive me!
265Good uncle, tell your tale; I have done.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Nay, if you have not, to it again;
We will stay your leisure.
HOTSPUR
I have done, i' faith.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Then once more to your Scottish prisoners.
270Deliver them up without their ransom straight,
And make the Douglas' son your only mean
For powers in Scotland; which, for divers reasons
Which I shall send you written, be assured,
Will easily be granted. You, my lord,
275Your son in Scotland being thus employ'd,
Shall secretly into the bosom creep
Of that same noble prelate, well beloved,
The archbishop.
HOTSPUR
Of York, is it not?
EARL OF WORCESTER
280True; who bears hard
His brother's death at Bristol, the Lord Scroop.
I speak not this in estimation,
As what I think might be, but what I know
Is ruminated, plotted and set down,
285And only stays but to behold the face
Of that occasion that shall bring it on.
HOTSPUR
I smell it: upon my life, it will do well.
NORTHUMBERLAND
Before the game is afoot, thou still let'st slip.
HOTSPUR
Why, it cannot choose but be a noble plot;
290And then the power of Scotland and of York,
To join with Mortimer, ha?
EARL OF WORCESTER
And so they shall.
HOTSPUR
In faith, it is exceedingly well aim'd.
EARL OF WORCESTER
And 'tis no little reason bids us speed,
295To save our heads by raising of a head;
For, bear ourselves as even as we can,
The king will always think him in our debt,
And think we think ourselves unsatisfied,
Till he hath found a time to pay us home:
300And see already how he doth begin
To make us strangers to his looks of love.
HOTSPUR
He does, he does: we'll be revenged on him.
EARL OF WORCESTER
Cousin, farewell: no further go in this
Than I by letters shall direct your course.
305When time is ripe, which will be suddenly,
I'll steal to Glendower and Lord Mortimer;
Where you and Douglas and our powers at once,
As I will fashion it, shall happily meet,
To bear our fortunes in our own strong arms,
310Which now we hold at much uncertainty.
NORTHUMBERLAND
Farewell, good brother: we shall thrive, I trust.
HOTSPUR
Uncle, Adieu: O, let the hours be short
Till fields and blows and groans applaud our sport!
Exeunt
2-1
Enter a Carrier with a lantern in his hand
FIRST CARRIER
Heigh-ho! an it be not four by the day, I'll be
hanged: Charles' wain is over the new chimney, and
yet our horse not packed. What, ostler!
OSTLER
Anon, anon.
FIRST CARRIER
5I prithee, Tom, beat Cut's saddle, put a few flocks
in the point; poor jade, is wrung in the withers out
of all cess.
Enter another Carrier
SECOND CARRIER
Peas and beans are as dank here as a dog, and that
is the next way to give poor jades the bots: this
10house is turned upside down since Robin Ostler died.
FIRST CARRIER
Poor fellow, never joyed since the price of oats
rose; it was the death of him.
SECOND CARRIER
I think this be the most villanous house in all
London road for fleas: I am stung like a tench.
FIRST CARRIER
15Like a tench! by the mass, there is ne'er a king
christen could be better bit than I have been since
the first cock.
SECOND CARRIER
Why, they will allow us ne'er a jordan, and then we
leak in your chimney; and your chamber-lie breeds
20fleas like a loach.
FIRST CARRIER
What, ostler! come away and be hanged!
SECOND CARRIER
I have a gammon of bacon and two razors of ginger,
to be delivered as far as Charing-cross.
FIRST CARRIER
God's body! the turkeys in my pannier are quite
25starved. What, ostler! A plague on thee! hast thou
never an eye in thy head? canst not hear? An
'twere not as good deed as drink, to break the pate
on thee, I am a very villain. Come, and be hanged!
hast thou no faith in thee?
Enter GADSHILL
GADSHILL
30Good morrow, carriers. What's o'clock?
FIRST CARRIER
I think it be two o'clock.
GADSHILL
I pray thee lend me thy lantern, to see my gelding
in the stable.
FIRST CARRIER
Nay, by God, soft; I know a trick worth two of that, i' faith.
GADSHILL
35I pray thee, lend me thine.
SECOND CARRIER
Ay, when? can'st tell? Lend me thy lantern, quoth
he? marry, I'll see thee hanged first.
GADSHILL
Sirrah carrier, what time do you mean to come to London?
SECOND CARRIER
Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant
40thee. Come, neighbour Mugs, we'll call up the
gentleman: they will along with company, for they
have great charge.
Exeunt carriers
GADSHILL
What, ho! chamberlain!
CHAMBERLAIN
At hand, quoth pick-purse.
GADSHILL
45That's even as fair as--at hand, quoth the
chamberlain; for thou variest no more from picking
of purses than giving direction doth from labouring;
thou layest the plot how.
Enter Chamberlain
CHAMBERLAIN
Good morrow, Master Gadshill. It holds current that
50I told you yesternight: there's a franklin in the
wild of Kent hath brought three hundred marks with
him in gold: I heard him tell it to one of his
company last night at supper; a kind of auditor; one
that hath abundance of charge too, God knows what.
55They are up already, and call for eggs and butter;
they will away presently.
GADSHILL
Sirrah, if they meet not with Saint Nicholas'
clerks, I'll give thee this neck.
CHAMBERLAIN
No, I'll none of it: I pray thee keep that for the
60hangman; for I know thou worshippest St. Nicholas
as truly as a man of falsehood may.
GADSHILL
What talkest thou to me of the hangman? if I hang,
I'll make a fat pair of gallows; for if I hang, old
Sir John hangs with me, and thou knowest he is no
65starveling. Tut! there are other Trojans that thou
dreamest not of, the which for sport sake are
content to do the profession some grace; that would,
if matters should be looked into, for their own
credit sake, make all whole. I am joined with no
70foot-land rakers, no long-staff sixpenny strikers,
none of these mad mustachio purple-hued malt-worms;
but with nobility and tranquillity, burgomasters and
great oneyers, such as can hold in, such as will
strike sooner than speak, and speak sooner than
75drink, and drink sooner than pray: and yet, zounds,
I lie; for they pray continually to their saint, the
commonwealth; or rather, not pray to her, but prey
on her, for they ride up and down on her and make
her their boots.
CHAMBERLAIN
80What, the commonwealth their boots? will she hold
out water in foul way?
GADSHILL
She will, she will; justice hath liquored her. We
steal as in a castle, cocksure; we have the receipt
of fern-seed, we walk invisible.
CHAMBERLAIN
85Nay, by my faith, I think you are more beholding to
the night than to fern-seed for your walking invisible.
GADSHILL
Give me thy hand: thou shalt have a share in our
purchase, as I am a true man.
CHAMBERLAIN
Nay, rather let me have it, as you are a false thief.
GADSHILL
90Go to; 'homo' is a common name to all men. Bid the
ostler bring my gelding out of the stable. Farewell,
you muddy knave.
Exeunt
2-2
Enter PRINCE HENRY and POINS
POINS
Come, shelter, shelter: I have removed Falstaff's
horse, and he frets like a gummed velvet.
PRINCE HENRY
Stand close.
Enter FALSTAFF
FALSTAFF
Poins! Poins, and be hanged! Poins!
PRINCE HENRY
5Peace, ye fat-kidneyed rascal! what a brawling dost
thou keep!
FALSTAFF
Where's Poins, Hal?
PRINCE HENRY
He is walked up to the top of the hill: I'll go seek him.
FALSTAFF
I am accursed to rob in that thief's company: the
10rascal hath removed my horse, and tied him I know
not where. If I travel but four foot by the squier
further afoot, I shall break my wind. Well, I doubt
not but to die a fair death for all this, if I
'scape hanging for killing that rogue. I have
15forsworn his company hourly any time this two and
twenty years, and yet I am bewitched with the
rogue's company. If the rascal hath not given me
medicines to make me love him, I'll be hanged; it
could not be else: I have drunk medicines. Poins!
20Hal! a plague upon you both! Bardolph! Peto!
I'll starve ere I'll rob a foot further. An 'twere
not as good a deed as drink, to turn true man and to
leave these rogues, I am the veriest varlet that
ever chewed with a tooth. Eight yards of uneven
25ground is threescore and ten miles afoot with me;
and the stony-hearted villains know it well enough:
a plague upon it when thieves cannot be true one to another!
Whew! A plague upon you all! Give me my horse, you
rogues; give me my horse, and be hanged!
PRINCE HENRY
30Peace, ye fat-guts! lie down; lay thine ear close
to the ground and list if thou canst hear the tread
of travellers.
FALSTAFF
Have you any levers to lift me up again, being down?
'Sblood, I'll not bear mine own flesh so far afoot
35again for all the coin in thy father's exchequer.
What a plague mean ye to colt me thus?
PRINCE HENRY
Thou liest; thou art not colted, thou art uncolted.
FALSTAFF
I prithee, good Prince Hal, help me to my horse,
good king's son.
PRINCE HENRY
40Out, ye rogue! shall I be your ostler?
FALSTAFF
Go, hang thyself in thine own heir-apparent
garters! If I be ta'en, I'll peach for this. An I
have not ballads made on you all and sung to filthy
tunes, let a cup of sack be my poison: when a jest
45is so forward, and afoot too! I hate it.
Enter GADSHILL, BARDOLPH and PETO
GADSHILL
Stand.
FALSTAFF
So I do, against my will.
POINS
O, 'tis our setter: I know his voice. Bardolph,
what news?
BARDOLPH
50Case ye, case ye; on with your vizards: there 's
money of the king's coming down the hill; 'tis going
to the king's exchequer.
FALSTAFF
You lie, ye rogue; 'tis going to the king's tavern.
GADSHILL
There's enough to make us all.
FALSTAFF
55To be hanged.
PRINCE HENRY
Sirs, you four shall front them in the narrow lane;
Ned Poins and I will walk lower: if they 'scape
from your encounter, then they light on us.
PETO
How many be there of them?
GADSHILL
60Some eight or ten.
FALSTAFF
'Zounds, will they not rob us?
PRINCE HENRY
What, a coward, Sir John Paunch?
FALSTAFF
Indeed, I am not John of Gaunt, your grandfather;
but yet no coward, Hal.
PRINCE HENRY
65Well, we leave that to the proof.
POINS
Sirrah Jack, thy horse stands behind the hedge:
when thou needest him, there thou shalt find him.
Farewell, and stand fast.
FALSTAFF
Now cannot I strike him, if I should be hanged.
PRINCE HENRY
70Ned, where are our disguises?
POINS
Here, hard by: stand close.
Exeunt PRINCE HENRY and POINS
FALSTAFF
Now, my masters, happy man be his dole, say I:
every man to his business.
Enter the Travellers
FIRST TRAVELLER
Come, neighbour: the boy shall lead our horses down
75the hill; we'll walk afoot awhile, and ease our legs.
FALSTAFF, PETO, GADSHILL, BARDOLPH
Stand!
TRAVELLERS
Jesus bless us!
FALSTAFF
Strike; down with them; cut the villains' throats:
ah! whoreson caterpillars! bacon-fed knaves! they
80hate us youth: down with them: fleece them.
TRAVELLERS, FIRST TRAVELLER
O, we are undone, both we and ours for ever!
FALSTAFF
Hang ye, gorbellied knaves, are ye undone? No, ye
fat chuffs: I would your store were here! On,
bacons, on! What, ye knaves! young men must live.
85You are Grand-jurors, are ye? we'll jure ye, 'faith.
Here they rob them and bind them. Exeunt
Re-enter PRINCE HENRY and POINS
PRINCE HENRY
The thieves have bound the true men. Now could thou
and I rob the thieves and go merrily to London, it
would be argument for a week, laughter for a month
and a good jest for ever.
POINS
90Stand close; I hear them coming.
Enter the Thieves again
FALSTAFF
Come, my masters, let us share, and then to horse
before day. An the Prince and Poins be not two
arrant cowards, there's no equity stirring: there's
no more valour in that Poins than in a wild-duck.
PRINCE HENRY
95Your money!
POINS
Villains!
As they are sharing, the Prince and Poins set upon them; they all run away; and Falstaff, after a blow or two, runs away too, leaving the booty behind them
PRINCE HENRY
Got with much ease. Now merrily to horse:
The thieves are all scatter'd and possess'd with fear
So strongly that they dare not meet each other;
100Each takes his fellow for an officer.
Away, good Ned. Falstaff sweats to death,
And lards the lean earth as he walks along:
Were 't not for laughing, I should pity him.
POINS
How the rogue roar'd!
Exeunt
2-3
Enter HOTSPUR, solus, reading a letter
HOTSPUR
'But for mine own part, my lord, I could be well
contented to be there, in respect of the love I bear
your house.' He could be contented: why is he not,
then? In respect of the love he bears our house:
5he shows in this, he loves his own barn better than
he loves our house. Let me see some more. 'The
purpose you undertake is dangerous;'--why, that's
certain: 'tis dangerous to take a cold, to sleep, to
drink; but I tell you, my lord fool, out of this
10nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety. 'The
purpose you undertake is dangerous; the friends you
have named uncertain; the time itself unsorted; and
your whole plot too light for the counterpoise of so
great an opposition.' Say you so, say you so? I say
15unto you again, you are a shallow cowardly hind, and
you lie. What a lack-brain is this! By the Lord,
our plot is a good plot as ever was laid; our
friends true and constant: a good plot, good
friends, and full of expectation; an excellent plot,
20very good friends. What a frosty-spirited rogue is
this! Why, my lord of York commends the plot and the
general course of action. 'Zounds, an I were now by
this rascal, I could brain him with his lady's fan.
Is there not my father, my uncle and myself? lord
25Edmund Mortimer, My lord of York and Owen Glendower?
is there not besides the Douglas? have I not all
their letters to meet me in arms by the ninth of the
next month? and are they not some of them set
forward already? What a pagan rascal is this! an
30infidel! Ha! you shall see now in very sincerity
of fear and cold heart, will he to the king and lay
open all our proceedings. O, I could divide myself
and go to buffets, for moving such a dish of
skim milk with so honourable an action! Hang him!
35let him tell the king: we are prepared. I will set
forward to-night.
How now, Kate! I must leave you within these two hours.
LADY PERCY
O, my good lord, why are you thus alone?
For what offence have I this fortnight been
40A banish'd woman from my Harry's bed?
Tell me, sweet lord, what is't that takes from thee
Thy stomach, pleasure and thy golden sleep?
Why dost thou bend thine eyes upon the earth,
And start so often when thou sit'st alone?
45Why hast thou lost the fresh blood in thy cheeks;
And given my treasures and my rights of thee
To thick-eyed musing and cursed melancholy?
In thy faint slumbers I by thee have watch'd,
And heard thee murmur tales of iron wars;
50Speak terms of manage to thy bounding steed;
Cry 'Courage! to the field!' And thou hast talk'd
Of sallies and retires, of trenches, tents,
Of palisadoes, frontiers, parapets,
Of basilisks, of cannon, culverin,
55Of prisoners' ransom and of soldiers slain,
And all the currents of a heady fight.
Thy spirit within thee hath been so at war
And thus hath so bestirr'd thee in thy sleep,
That beads of sweat have stood upon thy brow
60Like bubbles in a late-disturbed stream;
And in thy face strange motions have appear'd,
Such as we see when men restrain their breath
On some great sudden hest. O, what portents are these?
Some heavy business hath my lord in hand,
65And I must know it, else he loves me not.
HOTSPUR
What, ho!
Is Gilliams with the packet gone?
SERVANT
He is, my lord, an hour ago.
HOTSPUR
Hath Butler brought those horses from the sheriff?
SERVANT
70One horse, my lord, he brought even now.
HOTSPUR
What horse? a roan, a crop-ear, is it not?
SERVANT
It is, my lord.
HOTSPUR
That roan shall by my throne.
Well, I will back him straight: O esperance!
75Bid Butler lead him forth into the park.
Exit Servant
LADY PERCY
But hear you, my lord.
HOTSPUR
What say'st thou, my lady?
LADY PERCY
What is it carries you away?
HOTSPUR
Why, my horse, my love, my horse.
LADY PERCY
80Out, you mad-headed ape!
A weasel hath not such a deal of spleen
As you are toss'd with. In faith,
I'll know your business, Harry, that I will.
I fear my brother Mortimer doth stir
85About his title, and hath sent for you
To line his enterprise: but if you go,--
HOTSPUR
So far afoot, I shall be weary, love.
LADY PERCY
Come, come, you paraquito, answer me
Directly unto this question that I ask:
90In faith, I'll break thy little finger, Harry,
An if thou wilt not tell me all things true.
HOTSPUR
Away,
Away, you trifler! Love! I love thee not,
I care not for thee, Kate: this is no world
95To play with mammets and to tilt with lips:
We must have bloody noses and crack'd crowns,
And pass them current too. God's me, my horse!
What say'st thou, Kate? what would'st thou
have with me?
LADY PERCY
100Do you not love me? do you not, indeed?
Well, do not then; for since you love me not,
I will not love myself. Do you not love me?
Nay, tell me if you speak in jest or no.
HOTSPUR
Come, wilt thou see me ride?
105And when I am on horseback, I will swear
I love thee infinitely. But hark you, Kate;
I must not have you henceforth question me
Whither I go, nor reason whereabout:
Whither I must, I must; and, to conclude,
110This evening must I leave you, gentle Kate.
I know you wise, but yet no farther wise
Than Harry Percy's wife: constant you are,
But yet a woman: and for secrecy,
No lady closer; for I well believe
115Thou wilt not utter what thou dost not know;
And so far will I trust thee, gentle Kate.
LADY PERCY
How! so far?
HOTSPUR
Not an inch further. But hark you, Kate:
Whither I go, thither shall you go too;
120To-day will I set forth, to-morrow you.
Will this content you, Kate?
LADY PERCY
It must of force.
Exeunt
2-4
Enter PRINCE HENRY and POINS
PRINCE HENRY
Ned, prithee, come out of that fat room, and lend me
thy hand to laugh a little.
POINS
Where hast been, Hal?
PRINCE HENRY
With three or four loggerheads amongst three or four
5score hogsheads. I have sounded the very
base-string of humility. Sirrah, I am sworn brother
to a leash of drawers; and can call them all by
their christen names, as Tom, Dick, and Francis.
They take it already upon their salvation, that
10though I be but the prince of Wales, yet I am king
of courtesy; and tell me flatly I am no proud Jack,
like Falstaff, but a Corinthian, a lad of mettle, a
good boy, by the Lord, so they call me, and when I
am king of England, I shall command all the good
15lads in Eastcheap. They call drinking deep, dyeing
scarlet; and when you breathe in your watering, they
cry 'hem!' and bid you play it off. To conclude, I
am so good a proficient in one quarter of an hour,
that I can drink with any tinker in his own language
20during my life. I tell thee, Ned, thou hast lost
much honour, that thou wert not with me in this sweet
action. But, sweet Ned,--to sweeten which name of
Ned, I give thee this pennyworth of sugar, clapped
even now into my hand by an under-skinker, one that
25never spake other English in his life than 'Eight
shillings and sixpence' and 'You are welcome,' with
this shrill addition, 'Anon, anon, sir! Score a pint
of bastard in the Half-Moon,' or so. But, Ned, to
drive away the time till Falstaff come, I prithee,
30do thou stand in some by-room, while I question my
puny drawer to what end he gave me the sugar; and do
thou never leave calling 'Francis,' that his tale
to me may be nothing but 'Anon.' Step aside, and
I'll show thee a precedent.
POINS
35Francis!
PRINCE HENRY
Thou art perfect.
POINS
Francis!
Exit POINS
Enter FRANCIS
FRANCIS
Anon, anon, sir. Look down into the Pomgarnet, Ralph.
PRINCE HENRY
Come hither, Francis.
FRANCIS
40My lord?
PRINCE HENRY
How long hast thou to serve, Francis?
FRANCIS
Forsooth, five years, and as much as to--
POINS
Francis!
FRANCIS
Anon, anon, sir.
PRINCE HENRY
45Five year! by'r lady, a long lease for the clinking
of pewter. But, Francis, darest thou be so valiant
as to play the coward with thy indenture and show it
a fair pair of heels and run from it?
FRANCIS
O Lord, sir, I'll be sworn upon all the books in
50England, I could find in my heart.
POINS
Francis!
FRANCIS
Anon, sir.
PRINCE HENRY
How old art thou, Francis?
FRANCIS
Let me see--about Michaelmas next I shall be--
POINS
55Francis!
FRANCIS
Anon, sir. Pray stay a little, my lord.
PRINCE HENRY
Nay, but hark you, Francis: for the sugar thou
gavest me,'twas a pennyworth, wast't not?
FRANCIS
O Lord, I would it had been two!
PRINCE HENRY
60I will give thee for it a thousand pound: ask me
when thou wilt, and thou shalt have it.
POINS
Francis!
FRANCIS
Anon, anon.
PRINCE HENRY
Anon, Francis? No, Francis; but to-morrow, Francis;
65or, Francis, o' Thursday; or indeed, Francis, when
thou wilt. But, Francis!
FRANCIS
My lord?
PRINCE HENRY
Wilt thou rob this leathern jerkin, crystal-button,
not-pated, agate-ring, puke-stocking, caddis-garter,
70smooth-tongue, Spanish-pouch,--
FRANCIS
O Lord, sir, who do you mean?
PRINCE HENRY
Why, then, your brown bastard is your only drink;
for look you, Francis, your white canvas doublet
will sully: in Barbary, sir, it cannot come to so much.
FRANCIS
75What, sir?
POINS
Francis!
PRINCE HENRY
Away, you rogue! dost thou not hear them call?
Here they both call him; the drawer stands amazed, not knowing which way to go
Enter Vintner
VINTNER
What, standest thou still, and hearest such a
calling? Look to the guests within.
80My lord, old Sir John, with half-a-dozen more, are
at the door: shall I let them in?
PRINCE HENRY
Let them alone awhile, and then open the door.
Poins!
Re-enter POINS
POINS
Anon, anon, sir.
PRINCE HENRY
85Sirrah, Falstaff and the rest of the thieves are at
the door: shall we be merry?
POINS
As merry as crickets, my lad. But hark ye; what
cun